We all love a matching couple. At prom, whether you admit it or not, we’re all watching the couple that does it best, the ones that walk in looking like royalty from head to toe. We admire every last detail, the matching colors, the walk, the photos, all of it. We watched the more prominent couples in school like hawks. You know, those couples that seemed to last for years on end from middle school onwards. We knew about their make ups, their break ups, their fights, what they ate for lunch, what parties they went to together versus which ones they went without each other. We put value on how prominent they were in the eyes of the masses, how perfect they seem, how they seemed to be getting along versus how they were actually getting along. No one ever wants to check on the real wellbeing of the couple, rather they love to see the flawlessness, along with the crash and burn.
Why do you think so many young couples focus on materialism rather than real intimacy? It is absolutely the quickest way to express superiority and dominance as a couple. It is the easiest way to say, “yeah, we’re good.” Because what looks good on the outside… has to be good behind the scenes. Right?
Sure, we’re not focusing on building ourselves up financially, or otherwise, as individuals before coming together as a unit, but we have matching Balenciagas, so it’s G, right?
No, we’re not really finding out how to love ourselves first, but we lean on each other for emotional stability, just to ultimately blame them for the slightest inconveniences and major issues alike, even though they have nothing to do with the problems at hand, so that’s good?
Y’all, the problem that I am trying to dissect lies directly in the previous paragraph- read it again for me.
We are so focused on being the perfect couple, that we forget how to be the perfect couple. We forget that there’s actually no way to be the “perfect” couple. We forget that it takes getting to know one another, problem solve, sacrifice, and build in order to thrive as a unit. We take on that predisposition from a young age, that the flashier the relationship is, and if we accept every flaw, every hurt, every mistake unquestioningly, if we don’t discuss and change and just accept the situation for what it is… if we match, it’s all good.
If we match, it’s all good.
If you’re with someone for the flashiness… if you are with someone you love to match with on the outside, and my goodness, if you are with someone for the popularity and love of materialism, your relationship will surely show it.
It will not thrive. It will die.
So my question is this- do you all feel obligated to match, materialistically spoil, and create a beautiful outside image with your partner? Does that matter to any extent? Do you care how people perceive your relationship?
My view at the end of the day is this- once two individuals come together with the intention of understanding each other and creating an intimate bond, that outside look of stability will follow. Your relationship will inevitably thrive, and no one will have to question the status of your unit, not that it’s any of their business, but you know the nature of humans. We’re nosy.
Once you focus on pleasing your partner, you’ll forget all about pleasing the outside; you’ll forget all about the image, and care about the content.
What do you think? Leave it in the comments below, and thank you for reading! Next topic arriving Wednesday, October 23rd.